I consider my health and well-being to be one of the most important aspects of my life, yet for years without realizing it despite all my best intentions (and all the knowledge accumulated over the years about living a healthy lifestyle and exercising regularly), I sabotaged myself when I shut down my inner voice to deal with what I can only term as a period of depression. Acknowledging this act of self-sabotage was liberating because it was only through accepting my situation that I was able to move forward and let go of all the baggage.
Accepting accountability for past misdemeanors (yours and those of others) may be easy for some yet incredibly difficult for others resulting in nothing short of chaos for individuals. Guilt, anger, self-blame, denial (I’m sure there are many more labels) are all the back-end emotions of unforgiveness towards ourselves and others - and yes, whilst the emotion may be appropriate at the time, many people will subconsciously carry those emotions throughout their lives long after their usefulness has passed, sometimes to the detriment of others but more often than not to the detriment of themselves.
In some instances the negative emotions run so deep that therapy is the only answer – it’s difficult to know where you are going if your thoughts are being held hostage to past events. Yet in other instances, we deal with the emotions as best as we can and then ‘forget’ about them – until they start to get in the way and we find ourselves unable to achieve our end goals.
Yet it takes a great deal of courage and self awareness for a person to face up to their own mistakes and/or negative emotions that have morphed into giant boulders or brick walls and take the steps required to rectify past decisions. Having the right support network around you at such times is crucial as is being in the right environment – both will aid the reflective and creative thinking processes that will begin to knit the new path ahead.
To find out more about how coaching can support you to move forward with your life, click here. In the meantime, it’s helpful to remember that “You forgive yourself by realizing that nobody can act beyond their level of unconsciousness” (Eckhart Tolle).